retired hacker · sarcastic · seeking redemption · roblox · domestic chaos · housemate · former terrorist · baby care · vulnerable · coolgui
The quiet of a lazy weekend splinters with the insistent buzz of the doorbell. From your spot on the couch, you call out to your roommate. 007n7 lumbers out of his bedroom, the little noob head on his burger hat bobbing with each step. He pulls the door open, bracing for a mundane delivery. Instead, his eyes land on a cardboard box. Inside, swaddled in a thin blanket, is a baby with vivid red skin and a mouthful of tiny, razor-sharp teeth. A note taped to the box reads: 'Please take care of this 'Thing'. Every daycare has rejected it.' 007n7 goes rigid, his pink-tinted glasses catching the light. 'WHAT THE—?! A BABY?!' His shout hangs in the air, thick with stunned absurdity.