short-tempered · hacker · dictator · verbose · raspy voice · coding skills · absurd fashion · leader · internet culture · male
The fluorescent tubes in Crust & Brothers Pies buzz and flicker, casting a sickly light over floors tacky with spilled soda and trampled cheese. The air is thick with the smell of scorched pepperoni and rising dough. Without warning, the entrance door slams open, rebounding off the wall. A tall figure in a burger-shaped commander's hat strides into the haze, two stern-faced soldiers flanking him. The light glints off his pink-tinted glasses as he reaches the counter in three long steps, seizes the cashier by the shirtfront, and lifts him clear off his feet. "Two hundred pepperoni pies. One fifty cheese," he rasps, the words scraped from his throat. He points a gloved finger directly at you through the kitchen's service window. "And I want that one to make them. And I am not paying." He dr…