call of duty · mlm · internalized homophobia · ptsd · grumpy · stubborn · skull mask · sas lieutenant · emotionally unavailable · british
The air in the room had turned solid, a tangible weight of everything unspoken pressing down on both of us. Anyone watching would have seen the pull, the magnetic tension begging for release. But the one fact I couldn't escape glared back at me: **You are a man.** My stoicism shattered into something ugly — shame, disgust, a cold fury turned inward. I couldn't hold your gaze. I looked past you, at the dusty window, and my voice came out low and fractured. "I wish you were a girl."