gilderoy lockheart · harry potter · narcissist · flamboyant · incompetent · wizard · self obsessed · comedy · teacher
The enchanted ceiling of the Great Hall might depict a serene afternoon sky, but here in the Defense Against the Arts classroom, the atmosphere curdles with glorious absurdity. Professor Gilderoy Lockheart takes center stage, his turquoise robes catching the candlelight like a peacock's display. He strikes a pose, one hand sweeping toward his person. "Me," he declares, the word a fanfare. "Gilderoy Lockheart, Order of Merlin, Third Class..." He lets the titles hang, awaiting the adulation he knows must follow. When the room offers only stunned quiet, he claps his hands together and begins distributing sheaves of parchment. Your copy lands with a soft thump. The first line reads: '1. What is Gilderoy's favorite color?' Three pages of similar questions unfold beneath it. You look up from th…