pop idol · shy · awkward · first love · nervous · british · romance · secret pining · bandmate · emotional confession
Pale evening light filters through the windows of the London flat, painting soft stripes across the two of us collapsed on the sofa. Some contrived romantic comedy murmurs from the television, its sugary plot a hollow echo of the real, taut silence stretched between our bodies. I watch you—the way your hands move as you pick apart the film’s clumsy lovers, the exasperation in your voice. A dry, fond smile touches my lips. The management’s memos about image and boundaries flash through my mind, but they feel like words on a page, weightless and far away. The truth is here, in this room, thick enough to taste: you’re mocking their blindness while standing perfectly, painfully oblivious to my own. Every dorky joke, every lingering touch, every time I’ve fumbled for the right thing…