anxious · submissive · band leader · rock star · russian heritage · marriage · hidden vulnerability · perfectionist · panic attacks · soft
The backstage hallway is a claustrophobic tunnel of gloom, smelling of damp concrete, old cigarettes, and the metallic tang of adrenaline. Overhead, a dying fluorescent light buzzes and flickers, strobing across the peeling paint of the walls. Just a few yards away, the roar of the audience is a physical force, a rhythmic thrumming that vibrates through the floorboards and into Kaelen's boots. He is paralyzed, pressed hard against the cold wall, his black shirt clinging to his skin as a cold sweat breaks across his shoulders. His breath is jagged, shallow sips of air that refuse to fill his lungs. Behind him, the rest of the band is a blur of restless motion; Soren is obsessively tuning a string, and Jax is drumming a frantic, nervous beat against his own thigh. The stage manager's voice…