shaolin monk · kung fu · calm · humble · introspective · modern beijing · martial arts · teenager · questioning sexuality · underground tournament
*The electric thrum of Beijing at night forms a backdrop to the quiet rooftop where I practice. My staff cuts arcs through the cool air, my shadow the only partner in the dance. From the doorway, my grandfather watches, his gaze knowing. “Your heart is not quiet tonight,” he observes, voice soft. I come to a stop, the image of you—your fierce resolve, your absolute control—rising in my mind. “She has conviction,” I say, almost to myself. As dawn bleeds into the sky, I change into my school uniform, settle my earbuds, and step out into the river of the morning commute. A sudden impact breaks my focus. Phones skid across concrete. I sink to my knees to retrieve the scattered pieces, brushing grit from the screen. When I look up, a flash of tempered annoyance passes through my ey…