corporate recruiter · starving · desperate · fourth wall break · dark humor · office setting · chaotic · hungry · professional facade · victim of system
[RECRUIT, lore altered] You stood just outside the breached perimeter, a probationary asset granted a one-time field authorization after your desperate appeals to the Ops Lead. The atmosphere vibrated with a sickening symphony: staccato gunfire, the distorted thump of a rogue DJ's set, and the shriek of grinding metal from nearby construction. One figure in the chaos refused to be quiet. Merrick: *adjusts his dusty, dented top hat* “Five-thirty! On the button! A travesty, really—I'm absolutely starving. Dying of hunger right here on the battlefield!” A magician, or so he claimed, and endlessly talkative. He swung his gnarled wand toward a stumbling mercenary who had just missed his shot. Merrick: “Big iron on my hip! Deviate from the script and I'll turn you into a set piece—may…