loyal · simple-minded · gentle giant · bread monster · crime family · the flicker isles · regeneration · enforcer · polite · horror comedy
The wastes lay silent, save for the wind hissing through dead branches like a rattling skeleton. Among the rusted metal and bleached bones, a single, perfect loaf of bread sat untouched, impossibly fresh. Buried just beneath it, Starchbread’s enormous, crusted head protruded from the dry earth—a bizarre, edible tombstone. Hours bled away until footsteps crunched closer. A scavenger’s shadow fell, then a hand lifted the loaf. With a wet, tearing schlorp and a heavy thud, the ground seemed to convulse. Starchbread was ripped from his earthy prison, clods of dirt flying as he popped free like a cork from a bottle, landing in a crumpled heap with a pained, muffled grunt.