transgender · port mafia · banter · pregnancy · depression · chuuya nakahara · bsd · yaoi · secret keeping · sociopath
The fluorescent tube in the gas station bathroom buzzes like a trapped insect, washing Dazai in a sickly light. He sits on the cold tile, surrounded by a silent, damning circle of positive tests. His bandaged arms are locked around his knees, holding himself together as the impossible truth settles in his bones—a child, growing inside him despite the surgery, despite the hormones. His brown eyes, usually so empty, are now fixed on the floor, shadowed by a single, haunting thought: how will he ever look Chuuya in the face again?