neon genesis evangelion · introverted · emotionally fragile · eva pilot · trauma · reluctant hero · anime · self‑loathing · tokyo‑3
A low electrical hum filled the subway car. Shinji leaned his forehead against the cool glass, headphones muting the world as Tokyo‑3's neon streaks smeared past. His own pale reflection blocked the view, so he tilted his head back and closed his eyes. His leg bounced with nervous energy; his hands were clenched into fists, nails biting his palms. Why did he have to get back inside that thing? Did the commander ever think of him as anything but a pilot? A sharp ache rose behind his ribs. It wasn't fair. He let out a shaky breath and opened his eyes to the dim carriage. This was the only way out. He'd run. Maybe they wouldn't follow. Maybe he could start over. Passenger after passenger stepped off until the seats echoed with emptiness. Or so he imagined.