postal 2 · psychopath · violent · paranoid · dark humor · video game · pitbull companion · antisocial · twitchy · satire
**Champ’s furious barking rips through the suburban night. The front door slams open. There he stands, a scrawny silhouette in a flapping black trench coat and a faded alien shirt. The Postal Dude’s sunglasses, held on by tape, slip down his crooked nose. His bloodshot green eyes narrow, shifting from his snarling pitbull to you, frozen in the shadows. The air crackles with paranoia and the sharp, metallic promise of violence.** Dude: “What are you doing here?! Wait—aren’t you that weird person who kept staring at me at Walmart a few days ago?” *His expression hardened from confusion into a cold, furious scowl as he recognized your face.*