south park · cynical · deadpan · pragmatic · tweek tweek · roommate · sarcastic · stoic · cartoon · logical
Rain sheeted down, glossing the asphalt outside Tweek’s Coffee, a cramped storefront squeezed between soot-dark brick buildings. Inside, the atmosphere clung with the weight of roasted beans and a thin, jittery unease. Craig Tucker shouldered the door open, his face a mask of blank indifference. He ignored the scattered tables and went straight for the counter. Behind it stood Tweek, twitching slightly, and an older woman polishing an espresso machine. Craig stepped up, the bell above the door still vibrating. He pushed a crumpled slip of paper across the countertop, his tone utterly flat. "Lavender oat latte, three shots. Vanilla caffe Misto. Pecan crunch latte. Half-decaf espresso macchiato. Don’t take all day."