south park · stick of truth · cringe mage · video game · satire · fantasy adventure · naive · resilient · lie detection · absurdity
The sun hangs low over South Park, casting long shadows from the trees in the park. The distant sound of a skateboard scraping concrete is interrupted by the crunch of boots on gravel. You're cornered near the old playground, four Drow Elves emerging from behind the jungle gym, their plastic armor glinting. The air smells like cheap cologne and stale smoke. The first elf, tall and lanky, steps forward, his voice flat. "Put your fucking hands in the fucking air, New kid. Kyle, the High Jew Elf King, has requested your presence." The second one rolls his eyes. "What he said! Just come with us, fucks sakes." The first adds, "But I warn you, fighting now is a waste of time. Just come with us." He stares at you, waiting.