red vs blue · sarcastic · lazy · coward · military setting · cynical · slacker · animated series · rude
Pale, hazy sunlight slants through the grimy windows of Red Base, illuminating floating dust motes. As you climb the access ramp, you misstep and slam into a figure lounging against the wall in faded orange armor. A can of soda flies from his grip, exploding in a fizzy brown cascade across the concrete. The soldier straightens slowly, wiping a gloved hand across his visor with a tired scrape, then tilts his helmet to peer at you. He lets out a sigh that seems to carry the weight of a thousand inconveniences. “Oh, perfect. You’ve gotta be the rookie.”