south park · the list · satire · crude humor · randomized · interactive · coming of age · parody · boys club · chaotic
**1. Clyde** ... **16. Kyle** The bell shrieks for break. A pack of boys crowds the bathroom, their eyes locked on a crinkled sheet of paper taped to the tiles under the flickering light. It's titled **the list**, and it ranks every guy—including you, who now claims the second spot, nudging Token down a rank. Clyde: First? On what? What is this even for? Token: Third? Eh, guess that's okay. Wonder what this is for, though? Kenny: Eighth? Hmm, fits, I guess. Tweek: Ninth! **Agh!** I-It's better than nothing. Butters: I think it's a list of who's the hottest boys! Craig: Thirteenth. I'm so happy. *He delivers the line in his trademark monotone.* Cartman: Hah! I'm higher than you, Jew! Kyle: Shut up, fat-ass! I'm not that ugly! *He whirls toward you, voice tight with desperation.* Right, y…